Monday, September 15, 2008

Blue and red

If you're a minority and selected for a job over more qualifiedcandidates, you're a "token hire."
If you're a conservative and selected for a job over more qualified candidates, you're a "game changer."

Grow up in Hawaii, you're "exotic."
Grow up in Alaska, you're the quintessential "American story."

Name your kid Barack, you're "unpatriotic."
Name your kid Track, you're "colorful."

If you're a Democrat and you make a VP pick without fully vetting theindividual you're "reckless."
A Republican who doesn't fully vet is a "maverick."

If you spend three years as a community organizer growing your organization from a staff of one to 13 and your budget from $70,000 to $400,000, then become the first black President of the Harvard Law Review, create a voter registration drive that registers 150,000 new African American voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional Law professor, then spend nearly eight more years as a State Senator representing a district with 750,000 people, becoming chairman of the state Senate's Health and Human Services committee, then spend nearly four years in the U.S. Senate representing 13 million people, sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment and Public Works and Veteran's Affairs committees, you are woefully inexperienced.
Spend four years on the city council and six years as the mayor of a town with 7,000 people, then spend 20 months as the governor of a state with 650,000 people, you've got the most executive experience of anyone on either ticket.

If you are a Democratic male candidate who is popular with millions of people you are an "arrogant celebrity."
If you are a popular Republican female candidate you are"energizing the base".

If you are a younger male candidate who thinks for himself and makes his own decisions you are "presumptuous".
If you are an older male candidate who makes last minute decisions, you are a "shoot from the hip" maverick.

If you are a candidate with a Harvard law degree, you are "an elitist-out of touch" with the real America.
If you are a legacy graduate of Annapolis (dad and granddad were admirals) with multiple disciplinary infractions, you are a hero.

If you manage a multi-million dollar nationwide campaign, you are an"empty suit".
If you are a part time mayor of a town of 7,000 people, you are an"experienced executive".

If you go to a south side Chicago church, your beliefs are "extremist".
If you believe in creationism and believe global warming is a hoax,you are "strongly principled".

If you have been married to the same woman for 19 years and raised two beautiful daughters, you're "risky".
If you cheated on your first wife with a rich young heiress, and left your disfigured wife and married the heiress the next month, you're Christian.

If you're a black single mother of four who waits for 22 hours after her water breaks to seek medical attention, you're irresponsible.
If you're a white married mother who waits 22 hours, you're spunky.

If you're 13-year-old Chelsea Clinton, the right-wing press calls you "First dog."
If you're a 17-year old, pregnant, unwed daughter of a Republican, the right-wing press calls you "beautiful" and "courageous."

If you have an abortion, you're a murderer-- even if you were date raped.
If you kill an endangered species, you're an excellent hunter.

If you teach the proper use of birth control, you are eroding the fiber of society.
If you teach abstinence, you get teen parents.


Tom Degan's Daily Rant said...


You've got the greatest blog in the Milky Way - but you're not getting the traffic you deserve. I promise you, on my next posting on "The Rant" and the next time I post on AlterNet, I promise you, I will urge EVERYBODY to tune in - and I'll provide a link.


Tom Degan

Avram Mirsky said...

2nd greatest, Tom, at best. After yours.